Tale About Title and Hen Part I

I am an Opus number musician. Titles and program music turn me off as soon as I see it. I like absolute music. I don't want to be contaminated by titles.
A former student of mine, was playing for me a piano etude named "Little Flower". He told me - I do not dislike this piece, but I hate its title.
I told him that the composer had not named this set of etudes and in fact, I had a different edition where that same piece had a different title. I then told him to rename the piece to his liking.
A few weeks later, the same boy played the same etude for the state syllabus examination. The adjudicator, having nothing else to tell him, said - Imagine a little flower in your mom's garden... He replied - This piece is now called Page 53 (the page number where the piece had been printed).
Another student of mine performed a sophisticated and abstract Kabalevsky Prelude for a young and talented pianist who had just won an important competition. The pianist, after stating he did not know that piece, told the 13 year old boy to imagine a walk in the park, birds, bla, bla, bla.
I am sure Kabalevsly wasn't thinking about strolling in the park and getting his exercise done. He dedicated the Preludes Op.38 to his teacher Nikolai Miakovsky. The closest thing to a walk in the park was the tempo marking Andante non troppo.
When attending an Oregon Symphony concert, the conductor, trying to be friendly, disclosed to the audience that the Haydn Symphony we were about to hear was named by someone clever "THE HEN SYMPHONY" because the second theme sounded like the "jerky back-and forth head motion of a walking hen". Scary! All I could think from that moment on was... You guessed! The conductor achieved his goal.
Why do some people have the need to name music? What is wrong with Symphony in g minor or Hoboken I/83?
(there is a explanation for my change of tone)

To be continued...